Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
