problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
Randomize
