Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Randomize
