im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
