Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
Randomize
