I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
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