I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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