Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Randomize
