Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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