I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize
