Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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