We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
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