he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
he high fived his dick after we had sex
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
