If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
