i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
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