You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Randomize
