I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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