Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Randomize
