i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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