hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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