i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
