for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
tell me about the fingering
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
