Christians are straight up FREAKS
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize
