Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize
