Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
It's never too late to be topless.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
God I need to hump something, right now.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
