I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
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