fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
