The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
