Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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