this just has baby written all over it
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
