are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
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