We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
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