There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
its liver damage thursday
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
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