Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
You smell like a Billy Joel song
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
