Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
