Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize
