Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
