Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
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