Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(519): View more from Ontario

dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.

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(954): View more from Florida

I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on

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(416): View more from Toronto

Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order

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(678): View more from Georgia

He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?

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(415): View more from California

they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..

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(619): View more from California

We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.

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(765): View more from Indiana

he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.

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(630): View more from Illinois

sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life

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(912): View more from Georgia

Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.

(323): View more from California

How did you leave without pants?

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