this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
