Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(203): View more from Connecticut

Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.

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(910): View more from North Carolina

Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.

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(731): View more from Tennessee

He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....

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(555): View more from

My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique

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(909): View more from California

I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine

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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.

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(706): View more from Georgia

Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants

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(858): View more from California

My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.

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