I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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