You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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