hell yes lets make some ravioli
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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