Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
