I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
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