we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
