Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Randomize
