I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
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