I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Randomize
