You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Randomize